Being an American overseas has, like all things, both advantages and disadvantages. The difference however, is in the details. For example, one real advantage is the stark lack of a need for a visa to visit most countries. This simple fact most of us take for granted, however, there are those with passports that require bank statements, invitation letters, proof of residency of the letter sender, and a picture proving the friendship just to get a one week tourism visa into countries like Japan, England, and yes, the U.S.
However, it’s not at all roses and candy for Americans abroad. For one thing, there are the questions. Every American gets them, “This country is weird, but at least they didn’t vote for Bush, right?”; “So how did the Americans let Bush invade Iraq?”; “What’s going on with this person, Plame?”; “Why does America constantly support Israel?” or any number of similar questions involving whatever may be the latest political insanity coming out of the U.S. When I was in Spain, not long after 9/11, I had many people ask me all kinds of questions, mostly involving Bush somehow, though sometimes involving more obscure aspects of American politics, such as the reasons why Americans won’t vote for Ralph Nader, or why we only have two political parties. Most of my European friends are now convinced that the American government hands you a gun upon entry into the country (thank you Mr. Moore). I don’t think I’ve said the words “2nd Amendment” inside the US since 7th grade, but out here, it’s nearly a weekly conversation.
These questions invariably end either with the more timid and genuinely curious people accepting whatever argument you make, or the more stubborn simply degenerating into bashing American politicians, which is, of course, woefully easy.
Even for the more educated and, dare I say it, reasonable amongst these people, it can be tiresome and unreasonable to engage in these discussions. If one were a Ph.D. in comparative politics, or a career diplomat, it may be possible to fire back with some quips and queries about that person’s own domestic politics, but the simple fact is, most of us barely even know who Ralph Nader is, let alone why exactly he’s useless as a leader.
This intellectual bombardment follows every American everywhere, every bar, restaurant, party, and car ride, and it doesn’t matter if the other person is French, German, Columbian, Nigerian, or even another American. Somewhere, someone is going to criticize the U.S. and its politics, make some sweeping generalization that does little more than expose their own ignorance about the U.S., and propose a remedy that is so preposterous it will make you choke if you happen to be swallowing at the wrong moment.
I remember one man (yes, he was French), in my first conversation with him, I asked him a friendly question like “Why are the most beautiful foreign women in Vietnam all French?” He responded by first claiming that France is a utopia of mixing cultures, where everyone is accepted and cultures are freely shared (what are race riots?), resulting in beautifully mixed ethnic women. When I chimed in that America has a similar advantage (being a nation of only immigrants), he jumped into a 45 minute tirade about America being the most racist country on the planet, and the most violent, because of our terrible society and evil gun laws. When I asked him if he’d ever visited the US, he said no.
Eventually, we all learn just to smile and laugh, we really have no other choice when confronted with such terrible ignorance by “educated” people.
Nonetheless, part of the beauty of being thrown into absurdly multicultural situations is that one is forced to share both the good and the bad of other cultures. Nowhere is this more universally enjoyed than in the case of sharing one’s holidays. In a world with cultures with holidays and food that has been in development for thousands of years, there is little that America has to offer in the realm of cultural richness (McDonald’s and Coke don’t quite replace fois gras and Oktoberfest). However, there is one, bright, shining beacon of that which Americans are capable of: Thanksgiving.
There’s something very odd and beautiful about Thanksgiving overseas. Quite often, it’s almost impossible to do right. The fourth Thursday of November is a work day in most countries, turkey is not always easy to come by, let alone proper stuffing or cranberry sauce, it’s usually impossible to get the Dallas-Detroit game on TV, and the worst blow of all, most of us have to spend Thanksgiving away from our families. One would think that this would kill Thanksgiving, but the human desire to find a way to stuff one’s face with ungodly amounts of food is beyond traditional, it’s primordial.
When I lived in Spain, Thanksgiving was a community-wide affair. The family I lived with invited nearly every American they knew and packed them into their mid-size apartment. Including the kids table, there were 25 of us. We started eating and drinking at about 4 PM on
the Saturday after Thanksgiving. By midnight, we had finished 24 bottles of wine and 5 bottles of champagne.For most of us overseas, this is one of the few moments when it’s okay for us to miss America. I don’t mean miss our family, or our friends, or our home, we all always miss those things. But on Thanksgiving it’s finally okay for us to simply miss our country, our culture, our kind. Any other time, and missing American culture comes in the form of missing movies, music, TV, overly processed food (Kraft), and other materialistic things that make us ashamed to admit that we honestly miss these things. But on Thanksgiving, we miss something more, something that unifies us all (Americans, that is) and helps to define us as our own nation. It’s perhaps the only thing that is truly unique to Americans, that we don’t export to other countries for massive profits, and that’s not stolen from some other culture. Thanksgiving is pure, incorruptible, and most of all, it’s ours.
Part of the fun of Thanksgiving abroad is not just getting together with everyone you know and gorging yourself, but being able to teach this love and joy to those who have never experienced it before. German, Columbian, Nigerian, even the French have an insatiable curiosity about Thanksgiving. “What do you do?”; “We get together with friends and family, and we eat. A lot. And we say thanks.”; “Thanks? Thanks for what?”; “Hmm, nothing in particular. Anything, really. I mean, I guess, everything.”; “Thanks for everything? Hm, can I try it?”
America is unique because it is so jam packed full of everyone else’s nations that it has no nation of its own. The only time I’ve ever heard someone described as “half American” was coming out of a French woman’s mouth. Americans are not a nation, because we are not unified by thousands of years of common lineage and history like the Spanish or Chinese. However, on Thanksgiving, we can share something together that no other people in the world can properly understand. Thanksgiving is the closest Americans will ever come to experiencing a true unity as a nation of people, rather than just fellow citizens.
I think the reason for this is because of what we are sharing on Thanksgiving. You see, on a normal day, if two Americans reminisce about America, it’s usually regarding movies, or maybe food. But in reality, what these Americans are sharing is just a common experience. On Thanksgiving, Americans aren’t just sharing a common experience, they aren’t merely reminiscing about past Thanksgivings, but they are sharing a common spirit, the happiness of a deep sense of satisfaction, and the gratitude of having made it through another year.
For me, inside the US, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday, but outside the US, it is much more than just a holiday, more than a meal, it’s the one part of my country that follows me wherever I go, and the one time I do not have to defend my pride in my people. And for that, I am very thankful.
Until next time…
Love,
